".here's to maintaining proper Ph Levels in our vaginas, yeast infections!" 2. freshcutgrass 10 yr. ago. The light of the Christmas star to you. 28. Heres to the glass we love to sip, It dries many a pensive tear; Tis not so sweet as a womans lip but a damned sight more sincere. May all your ups and downs be between the sheets. Heres to wars and revolution. Collection. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. May the face of every good news And the back of every bad news Be towards us. Others are long but great drinking toasts perfect for telling your closest friends. Here's to cheating, stealing, fighting, and drinking. 32. So, let's all get drunk, and go to heaven!" "I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy. Some are more casual, while others are formal. May your troubles be less and your blessings be more, and nothing but happiness come through your door. May all your ups and downs be between the sheets. Privacy Policy. Heres to the brilliant, warm, handsome company that you keep. 81.) Out with the old, in with the new, cheers to the future, and all that we do. So lets all get drunk and go to heaven. Loyal, willing and able. Running From The Devil May your glass be ever full. It's time for a toast. ; A (unique?) We are happy to present the ultimate collection of bachelorette party . Can you hold my beer?. If drinking alcohol makes you an alcoholic, does drinking fanta make you fantastic? Heres to you. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. After a sudden burst of inspiration, he pulls out a small pad of paper and writes on it: I spit in this beer. Putting the note on the beer, he heads off to the bathroom. Heres to being naughty and saving Santa a trip. Heres to women. "Here's to the beer we love to and the death we like to cheat. Here's to you. Heres to the women who love me terribly, May they soon improve. May the doctor never earn even a cent from you. Luckily, I woke up, and I see that the world is just as it should be. Heres looking at you, although heaven knows it takes all of my efforts. 2. Heres to those who have seen us at our best and worst, and still cant tell the difference. 84.) May the best of your past be the worse of your future. May we never meet a friend coming down when climbing the hill of prosperity. Today, toasts are for parties, weddings, gatherings, and events. o being single, seeing double, and sleeping triple. Let's get wasted all the time and have the time of our life. It is customary to take a sip of your drink when someone toasts you. poke her in the butt, and you won't knock her up! With this collection you can add levity to any special event and will surely add some personal touch to it. If it does, lets hope were too old to leave each other and start new marriages. 3. Check out these fun and interesting beer quotes. "Life is a waste of time. May our children be blessed with rich parents! 80.) Start a bachelor party or any celebration at the bar with this winning poetic but funny toast. From mobile games, apps and quizzes, to party and drinking games. Four guys drinking Bud Light and watching a football game! Heres to the floor. Coincidence?" - Stephen Wright "I followed my heart & It led me to ALCOHOL." Let us drink with impunity Or anyone else whos buying. God damn them! A rich man lives in a castle, a poor man lives by the sea. but just for you, I will.. till it's out of me and out of you. The joy of a thousand angels to you. I drank to your health so many times I nearly ruined my own. Heres to the husbands whove won you, the losers whove lost you, and the lucky bastards whove yet to meet you. -Nick Mercer, 3. I drank to your health alone. 71.) 8. Wise, kind, gentle, generous, sexy but enough about me. 16. "The past is history, the future is a mystery, but today is a gift because it's the present." #8. "I work until beer o'clock.". 33.) Here's to love, laughter, and a happily ever after. Here's to a man after my own heart. Smart, sophisticated, friendly, and beautiful Now that's enough about me Here's a toast to you my dear friend! 2. 128 Views. I feel sorry for wild animals because its like theyre always camping without beer. For if ever they all left the country at once, Wed be left in a state of stagnation. A Bachelorette Party Toast - To String. All Illustrations: Aida Amer (Glassware: Boleslaw Kubica/ Shutterstock) Raise your glass and sing a song of celebration! No charge!, 44.) Whats the difference of deer nuts and beer nuts? "Here's to women, beer and song, may none of them be flat." 3. Here's to the present and the friends who are here. So, lets drink these pints and get messed up. Some people like to start with a quote or funny saying. "To absent friends, lost loves, old gods, and the season of mists; and may each and every one of us always give the devil his due.". below:Here's to me. 5. Especially if youre an old fellow with an army of memories. 7. Cheers to beers and legs behind your ears. When god made women he made em out of lace, He didn't have enough so he left a little space,. Marry a man your own age; as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight. Fuc-King! "Trust me: You can dance Alcohol." Unknown "Responsible Drinking? 29.) Three of my favorite things. 22.) A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. To Men. that stays forever after. Get excited about the future. Drinking All The glasses Off The Table My friends are the best friends. Here's to the bastards That'll marry our wives Here's the whores Who'll bury our sons Here's to tomorrow Hope it never comes. 9.) Here's to the guys we fuck and screw. "May we generally be happy, generally be witty, generally be honest, but above all always be interesting.". Its a way to unify a group, mark a special occasion, or acknowledge someone. May God bless old Ireland, thats this Irishmans toast. Heres to the woman who wears the red shoes. Heres to those who wish us well, all the rest can go to hell. Here's to "The Usual". 47.) The warmth of home and hearth to you. Heartbreak makes you wiser. Updated Apr 27, 2020 at 1:18am. Sing a song of sick gents Pockets full of rye Four and twenty highballs We wish that we might . And to make an end is to make a beginning. A cold pint and another one." 4. Love is blind marriage is the eye-opener. Heres to the women who have used and abused us. I drank to your health in the company, I drank to your health alone, I drank to your health so many times, I nearly ruined my own. Thus, let us drink beer!Martin Luther, My main ambition as a gardener is to water my orange trees with gin. If you get a bad one, youll become a philosopher. I drank to your health so many times I nearly ruined my own. 12. I'm s. But the best ships are friendships, and may they always be! Heres to good friends, Never above you, Never below you, Always beside you. May the roof over your head be always strong. Heres to the big bull in the woods. 61.) Heres to friends and family who know us well but love us just the same! In ancient Greece, cheersing while drinking has been an important tradition. 6. Alcohol may be mans worst enemy, but the Bible says love your enemy. When he returns, hes delighted to see his full beer still sitting there with the note. 3. Heres to those who have seen us at our best and seen at our worst and cant tell the difference. 4. Heres to the floor, who will hold you when no one else will. 68.) Conditions of
When we get drunk, we fall asleep. To your genitalia: May they never fail ya, or jail ya. Have no idea how I got home from the sofa. Heres to your liver! May you have nicer legs than yours under the table before the new spuds are up. Stop trying to make everyone happy. The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams. A quick death and an easy one. After all, advancing birthdays are much better than the alternative. Three of my favorite things. Awesome Alcohol Quotes and Sayings "Alcohol You Later." "Trust me You can Dance - Alcohol" "If life gives you lemons, Add VODKA." "I followed my heart & It led me to ALCOHOL." "Step Aside COFFEE This is a Job for ALCOHOL" "Drunkenness is nothing but voluntary madness." Seneca 39.) So lets all get drunk and go to heaven. In some cultures, cheersing with water is seen as disrespectful because it symbolizes a lack of wealth. "I did all right," the drunk says with a smile. They are perfect for any party. Heres to the only day I will ever be a morning person, December 25th. For last year's words belong to last year's language, and next year's words await another voice. 91.) Heres that we may eat the hen that scratches on our grave. 73.) 5. Here are some funny drinking toasts to make birthdays more special and induce gales of laughter. Here's to them for fucking us over,and here's to us for never being sober! This could . "Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker." An oldie but goodie. 7. May you live to wholeheartedly follow your bliss, and follow your bliss to live wholeheartedly. 11. Heres to champagne for our real friends and real pain for our fake friends. When we drink, we get drunk. However, if everyone at the table cheers with water, there is no issue. Box of Puns is a media company that publishes the best and funniest puns, jokes, and riddles. Heres to a long life and a happy one, a quick death and an easy one, a good man and an honest one, a cold pint and another one. May it live as long as you last. Whats the difference between men and pigs? May the winds of fortune sail you, May you sail a gentle sea, may it always be the other guy who says: This drinks on me., Heres to the girls who do And heres to the girls who dont And heres to the girls who say they never will, But when the time comes, wont. Heres to those whove seen us at our best and seen us at our worst and cant tell the difference. Heres to a man after my own heart. Doesnt everyone?Noel Coward, There comes a time in every womans life when the only thing that helps is a glass of Champagne.Bette Davis, Whoever drinks beer, he is quick to sleepwhoever sleeps long, does not sin; whoever does not sin, enters Heaven! Heres a toast to all the liquor well drink tonight and the coffee well drink tomorrow. When we drink, we get drunk. It is customary to take a sip of your drink when someone toasts you. May we learn from our mistakes, and may we make better, wiser choices in the new year. To hell: May the stay there be as fun as the way there. Pros and Cons, 13 Clever tips for finding Cheap Flights in 2020. "Here's to a long life and a happy one. When the glass is full, Drink up! Happy birthday! 8. Happy birthday, darling! This maybe the last time We see this cup. 17. Four I'm under the host!" "When we drink, we get drunk. Whether youre heading out on the town or day drinking during a lockdown, youll find just the right line to share with your friends. But a whiskey glass and a fat girls ass are home, sweet home to me. Gallery: 1/9. An optimist stays up until midnight to see the New Year in. And may all your friends remember all the favors you are owed. There is nothing like sarcastic, goofy toasts. True friendship means loving each other for who we really are. The dew is on the heather. The test of Gold is Fire The test of Truth is Time The test of Gods love are the heavens above and everything sublime. Well explore them together for a life filled with love, joy, and fun. Villarreal X Getafe - Ao Vivo Grtis HD Sem Travar | Futebol Grtis HD. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. Now that you know, here are some funny drinking toast ideas you haven't heard: 1. Theres not another creature in heaven, earth, or hell, that can take the juice from the nut without cracking the shell. A thousand welcomes when anyone comes That's the Irish for you! When you get to it, and cant do it; Come see me, because Im used to it! He says, youve got a great place, but my buddy was here last night, and he said you have golden urinals. Here's to the people we've . The liver is evil and must be punished. May you never meet her daughter, Miss Fortune. 69.) 29. 23.) To the new couple: Never sweat the petty things, but always pet the sweaty things. Another year has passed, and youre no older than the last! If God wanted us sober, He'd knock the glass . I drank to your health so many times.I nearly ruined my own." But not too many toastings, lest you lose yourself, and then forget about good Patrick and see all those snakes again. 39. Heres to those who wish us well. Where are they? The bartender turns to the band and yells, Frank, Ive got a lead on the guy who ruined your sax!, 43.) Heres to whores and prostitution, big ole bulls that keep on buckin and pretty little girls that keep on fuckin. 5. Alcohol is not in my vodkabulary, but I looked it up on whiskeypedia. Congratulations, buddy! 21.) Here's to you and here's to me, Friends may we always be! If you Fight, may you fight for a friend. Life always offers you a second chance It's called tomorrow. Heres to the women, with little pink shoes; who steal all our money and drink all our booze; now, shes not a virgin but thats not a sin, cause shes still got the box that the cherry came in. We have only today. Whether youre celebrating a special occasion or just having a few drinks with friends, these toasts can help make the experience more enjoyable. Humorous birthday toasts and funny sayings give us a chance to laugh at the trials and tribulations of maturity. But the ocean's not beer and I'm not a duck, so let's drink these pints and get messed up. We hope you found some quote within this list that suits you and represents you as a character. Life is a waste of time, and time is a waste of life. 8. There is no set rule for starting a toast. I never know whether to pity or congratulate a man on coming to his senses. Ive got way too much blood in my alcohol system. And vodka makes you not remember any of that. A rich man lives in a castle, a poor man lives by the sea. Heres to your good health. 12. To Hell. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. Heres to you. Heres to staying positive and testing negative. "Here's health to those I love and wealth to those who love me." "Be the change you wish to see in the world." Gandhi. Heres toasting to your health. They would clink their glasses before drinking mead to show that they were not poisoning each other. Happy birthday! 2.) I drank to your health in company. Heres to bread because, without bread, theres no toast. May you live for as long as you want, and never want for as long as you live! A supreme liter. Check out these famous whiskey quotes and sayings. Cheers to that. Let us have a toast to one of the best men I have enjoyed getting to know. "I can smell wine, Father," said the Garda. 11:11a, 1/27/12. May the bloom of the face Never extend to the nose. ToastsforMen | ToastsforWomen | GayToasts | ToastAnecdotes | BawdyDefinitions | AntiquatedBawdyToasts | BawdyGermanToasts | CheersBigEars
A neutron walks into a bar and asks, how much for a beer? The bartender replies, for you? Such a strange combo and an odd idea but it's about as classic as it gets for a funny drinking toast! Heres to lesbians, because they have good taste. Heartbreak makes you wiser. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice. 88.) There was once a sailor named Ron who told to his date ''you are tight one, aren't you?'' Knowing your audience plays a huge part in the success of a toast. 5.) 23. JOGOS DE HOJE. May you live to be 100 years, with one extra year to repent. The priest looks from the bottle to the heavens. "Except me mammy, of course!" "Well then," says Seamus. However, suppose you do not drink alcohol or want to consume less at the moment. May the luck of the Irish Lead to happiest heights And the highway you travel Be lined with green lights. Heres hoping you live forever. Pain makes you stronger. 40 of the Best Drinking Toasts 1. Drink to life and the passing show And the eyes of the prettiest girl you know. If given the truth, they can be depended upon to meet any national crisis. A quick death and an easy one. If the ocean was beer and I was a duck, I would swim to the bottom and drink myself up. Use to increase sales during happy . Whats the only drink size they allow in North Korea? Who loves not women, wine, and song, He will be a fool his whole life long. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. Here's to those who have seen us at our worst and still showed up here anyway. Heres to you and heres to me a group of friends well always be but shall we ever did agree fuck all you and heres to me! Sure let me grab my license. So fine and divine, they bleed every month, and bear every nine. 19. Another famous toast you can use at your best friends bachelor party. 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